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With age comes wisdom If sex is painful or uncomfortable for your wife, it makes sense that intimacy has gotten the short shrift, said Elizabeth McGrath, a sex therapist and educator who works in the Bay Area.

McGrath also said to remember to take things slow: Sex is about so much more than just, well, sex. Hold her hand. Rub her neck.

Ask yourself: Over time, your sex life may have gone from hot to humdrum. Instead of dwelling on your lackluster sex life, focus a little more on the emotional connection you share with your wife, Nelson said. And guess what?

Repeat it back so you are sure you got it before moving on to the next one. Then, Nelson recommends expanding the conversation by quizzing each other about the three things you hhave about having sex.

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